disappointed

another disappointment again..
why...
am i not paying effort enough?
i did...
but why always like that..
i willing to learn, just let me get what i want...
what is so hard for this?

heart breaking ...
i tried and tried and tried...
am i not sincere enough?
i did..
but why u cant see...

i cant stand anymore..
too much of disappointment...
went for a few interviewed ..
the job i want never want me..
the job i dont want always come to me..
no exceptions!!
wat the fuck..
why i must face this kind of shit..
why others can found wat their want..
to build their career..
wat the fuck am i doing here..

dont tell is reality..
u know how much i hate this word..
i know is reality..
is it means i must accept it..
i hv the responsibility to make my life happy..
i'm just 24 years old gal..
let's say i accept the fact that's reality..
i shouldn't chasing watever i want..
just accept watever ppl offered me..
what do i gt until the end of my life?
ntg..
just the stupid fact and it so called reality..
fuck it..


is ok if you think i'm not the right person for your company..
at least let me know..
the feeling is suck when u waiting for ntg...
do let me know.. pls...
at least i know i can move forward...
pls..

dear god..
i need you badly..
pls gv me strength ...